Elope?
by zivvie
Summary: Tony: The vows... Ziva: ...the ring... Tony: ...the kiss... Ziva: The ketubah. Tony: I don't know what I'd do if I had to deal with all Ziva: Elope? 9x24- TDDUP
1. Chapter 1

"Strenuous day huh?", Tony said, balancing the plastic bag on his way in, closing the door with his foot.

"You have no idea", Ziva replied, sleepily from the couch.

"What did ya got?", she asked and turned the volume from the movie she was currently watching, down.

"The sound of music?", Tony asked and raised an eyebrow.

"I like it", she replied with a smile.

"Alright, I got us Latkes and chocolate cake", Tony said with a grin on his face.

Ziva's eyes went wide.

"Where in the world did you get that from?", she asked while wrapping her arms around Tony's neck.

"Secret", he mumbled while kissing her on the lips.

"Thank you", she mumbled knowingly that he knew she meant the food and the kiss.

"Did you bring any napkins?", she asked, looking up from his chest.

"Oh no. I forgot", he replied laughing.

"Lemme get some", she said but felt an arm wrap around her waist.

"You know, we could just kiss"

Ziva creased her face.

"No, that would be gross"

"Really?", Tony asked tilting his head.

Ziva kissed his nose before getting up.

"This chocolate cake is so good", Ziva said rubbing her stomach while eating more cake.

"Not as good as this", Tony replied and kissed her sweetly.

Soon the cake was forgotten and clothes landed on the floor.

Out of nowhere her alarm clock started to beep. With a smack the alarm clock stopped and Tony grunted.

"I don't want to get up", Ziva mumbled into his neck.

"Neither do I sweet cheeks", he replied and kissed her head.

"Wait what day is today?, Tony asked rubbing Ziva's neck.

"Saturday", Ziva replied.

Tony glanced at the clock and scratched his head.

"Saturday... Saturday- Oh, we have the weekend off ", he said with a laugh.

"Good",Ziva said nuzzling Tony's chest.

"I love you too", he said kissing her head.

She humed in agreement and closed her eyes. Both of them drifted into a slumber almost immdiately.


	2. Chapter 2

"Ugh what should we get him?", Ziva asked and rubbed her chin.

"A movie?"

"Tony, we do not get him a movie as a wedding present"

"Why not? I'm sure he would love it"

"How would you feel if your friend would give you a movie on your wedding day?"

"Depends on the movie"

Ziva smiled and pushed him against a shop window.

"Hey, what was that for?"

"You said you would accept a movie as a present on your wedding"

Tony's eyes widened. He could have sworn she said _our_ wedding.

"So what do we buy now?"

"Do you know anything that Breena would like?"

"No but we could ask Mcshopper"

"Really? Mcshopper?", Ziva asked and looked at him.

"Remember he is my Mcmuse"

Ziva laughed.

"And I thought I was your inspiration", she whispered leaning in.

"You are, in so many ways", he replied, ready to kiss her.

"I know what to get him", Ziva replied squeaking.

Tony opened his eyes.

"Evil woman", he mumbled and looked at her.

"Come on", she said and dragged him into a store.

"We just didn't get him bedding"

"We did", Ziva replied with a smile.

"You are unbelievable"

"He and Breena will love it, I'm sure"

"Are you hungry?", Tony asked and wrapped his arms around her from behind.

"Since when are you into PDA?"

"Am I not allowed to hug my girlfriend?"

Ziva whinced.

"Could you please stick to the term partner?"

"Why bambina?"

"We both know that I am a special agent"

"You are bambina"

"Remember this?", Ziva asked and held up a paperclip.

Tony swalllowed.

"Yeah"

"I am still able to do it in 18 different ways"

"Okay, okay I'm sorry Zee-vah"

"You are forgiven hairy butt"

"My butt isn't hairy"

"Sure it isn't", Ziva replied walking back to Tony's car, keys dangling on her fingers.


	3. Chapter 3

2 days later:

"No, It's raining", Tony whined and looked at his partner.

"Why is that bad?"

"Because I can't see you in a bikini"

"Why would you see me in a binkini? Besides it's October", Ziva replied confused.

"Remember those pictures I took while we were in LA?"

"Uhm"

"I would like to repeat that"

"You in a bikini? I don't think anyone wants to see that DiNozzo"

Tony turned around with a scared expression.

"Boss, I'm sorry", he said coughing.

Gibbs smirked.

"Just go home", he said and walked towards the elevator with a Caf-Pow in his left hand.

"Busted", Ziva whispered and laughed.

Tony rolled his eyes and grabbed his gear, before walking up to Ziva's desk.

"See you tomorrow sweet cheeks?", he asked sittng down on the edge of her desk.

"Tony", Ziva said warningly.

"What?", he whispered leaning forward.

"Not here", Ziva replied and looked at him wickedly.

"Why not sweet cheeks?"

Suddenly Tony felt a very sharp pain in his back and yelped.

"I'm game", he yelled and jumped up fron the desk.

Ziva smirked at him, holding a paperclip in her hands.

"Damn paperclip", he mumbled walking towards the elevator.

Ziva laughed and continued to work on her paperwork.

"So", McGee said with a smile on his face.

"So what?", Ziva asked and looked up.

"You are dating aren't you?"

"Ssshhh", Ziva hushed him.

"Gibbs wont be amused of you two breaking rule #12"

"That's why we keep it a secret, Tim"

"Sooner or later he will find out anyway"

"What the eye does not see, the stomach does not grieve over"

"It's heart", McGee said holding back a laugh.

"What?"

"Forget it", Tim replied laughing.

"Who doesn't grieve over what?", Gibbs asked walking back into the bullpen.

"Nothing, boss", McGee said and returned to his desk.

"Don't you want to go home Ziver?", Gibbs asked and said down on his chair.

"Okay, okay. Good night guys", Ziva said grabbing her jacket.


	4. Chapter 4

Ziva's phone vibrated.

"What do you want, Tony?", she asked and wrapped herself up in her blanket.

"Why so harsh?", he asked.

"You almost blew our cover and Tim knows"

"He has known since day 1"

"You swore you wouldn't tell anyone"

"Sorry"

"You better be", she mumbled.

"Anyways, do you want ice cream?"

"What?"

"You heard me", Tony replied with a laugh.

"Uhm sure, yeah", Ziva replied, wiggling her toes.

The doorknob turned and Ziva grabbed her gun, slowly approaching the door.

"Surprise, surprise", Tony yelled and opened the door.

"God, DiNozzo", Ziva called and kicked him into his private parts.

He dropped the bags and threw himself on the ground.

"Hey, hey put the gun down", Tony replied with big eyes and collected the bags while getting up from the ground.

"I thought you were someone else", Ziva said and put the gun back into her drawer.

Tony shook his head and chuckled.

"As if", he mumbled and grabbed a bowl and a spoon.

"Just one spoon?"

"I was thinking of feeding you but after your little ninja fit, I might eat it all myself"

Ziva walked up to him with a puppy dog face.

"You kicked me into my private are", he said looking down at her.

"Like I said I thought you were someone else"

"Who did you expect? Ninjas?"

"Sort of", she replied with a giggle.

Tony smiled.

"So", Ziva whispered and wrapped her arms around his torso.

"You still want to eat that all by yourself?"

Tony swallowed.

"Well, if you must know my plan has changed"

"Really?", Ziva asked.

"Yeah"

"Great", she replied happily and ran to the couch.

Tony rolled his eyes before looking into her direction, wickedly.


	5. Chapter 5

"What do you exactly wear at a wedding?", Ziva asked out of the blue and laced her fingers with Tony's.

"A bikini", he replied and earned himself a slap on the back of his head.

"I'll just look at the invitation", Ziva replied.

"Okay", Tony replied lazily.

"We are supposed to wear black and white clothes"

"black and white bikini?"

Ziva slapped him across his head with the invitation.

"Stop thinking about bikinis and get your ass up, we need to go and buy clothes for Jimmy's wedding, hairy butt"

"Okay, okay but I am driving", he said and swapped the keys off her hands.

"Fine", she mumbled and followed quickly.

"Ugh", Ziva said and hung back the 10th dress she was trying on.

"You know what would look good on you?"

"Not a bikini", she replied.

Tony shook his head and pointed towards a beautiful wedding dress. Ziva's eyes got big.

"Tony", she replied softly.

"Hm?", he said and tilted his head.

"We aren't- are we?", she asked shyly.

He chuckled.

"No worries sweet cheeks"

Ziva blew out a long breath and remembered the conversation they had a couple of weeks ago.

_Tony: Who likes weddings, anyway? Weird uncles with inappropriate toasts..._

_her: Rubber chicken enhanced with cheap wine..._

_Tony: Cheesy music and children... rental tuxedos..._

_her: Bouquets, the garter, the cake... and fittings...!_

_Tony: The vows..._

_her: ...the ring..._

_Tony: ...the kiss..._

_her: The ketubah._

_Tony: I don't know what I'd do if I had to deal with all of that._

_her: Elope?_

"You there?", Tony asked and waved with a hand in front of her face.

"Sorry", she mumbled and Tony just smirked.

"How about this?", she replied and picked out a dress half white, half black.

"Try it on", he said and smiled at her.

She came out and his jaw dropped.

"You look gorgeous, I hope you don't steal Breena's show"

Ziva rolled her eyes.

"As if"

"You will certainly have my attention most likely all the time"

"You mean when you are not eating?"

"Exactly"

Ziva laughed and walked back into the changing room. They purchased the dress happily.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: I hope you like it :) **

* * *

"What are you going to wear?", Ziva asked looking up from the TV.

"A tuxedo or should I wear my shorts and a Hawaiin shirt?"

"The motto is black and white... I doubt that you will find a black and white Hawaiin shirt", she replied with an amused face.

"You can still dye it", he said with a grin.

"Don't you think that's too much work than just buying a tuxedo? I bet you have one in your closet", she said dragging him into his bedroom.

She opened his closet eagerly and landed on her butt within a second. All of his clothes decided to fall out and bring her down to the floor.

"DiNozzo", she huffed.

"I gotcha Zee-vah", he said and pulled her out of his clothes.

"Since when is your closet attacking people?"

"Since today", he replied with a laugh.

"You seriously have too many tuxedos", Ziva said angrily.

"One does not simply have too many tuxedos, Ziva"

"Do not talk in meme to me, help me with your clothes instead"

They folded tuxedo after tuxedo for an hour and Ziva almost fell asleep.

"Am I boring you?", he asked and nudged her.

"Huh?", she grunted and rubbed her eyes.

"I think my ninja needs to go to sleep"

"No, no I'm up", she said and jumped.

Tony laughed and hugged her tightly.

"Nope, we are going to sleep, it's late come on", he said and dragged her to bed.

"I am fine, Tony", she said and yawned.

"Sure my ninja", he laughed and slid closer to her.

"Buona notte", he whispered into her ear.

"Laila tov" she replied and closed her eyes with a smile on her face.

Ziva heard a loud bang and opened her eyes, feeling for her gun but there was none instead she reached for the lamp and looked around. The side next to her was empty and she looked over the bed. DiNozzo was lying on the floor whining. She laughed out loud.

"Tony what are you doing on the floor down there?"

"I was trying to roll off the bed like normal people and stand up elegant but I rolled out too far and here I am, help me up?"

"Nah", she said and walked into the bathroom.


	7. Chapter 7

"Do you know where I put my dress?"

"For what? Jimmy's wedding is tomorrow"

"I know, I just wanted to know how it looks with the shoes I bought"

"When did you buy shoes?"

"Yesterday"

"But I was with you all the time", Tony said, eyes getting big.

Ziva held up her phone.

"Ah that's why you were grinning like an idiot on our way home and I thought it had something to do with me"

Ziva shot him a look.

"It's in the top drawer"

"How did you sneak it into your appartment?"

"I got my skills"

Ziva grunted.

"Anyways, I am going to go back into my appartment now and I'll see you tomorrow. When are you going to pick me up?"  
"3 pm but I want to come over earlier"

"No, 3 pm it is"

"Come on zee-vah"

She laughed.

"Laila tov", she whispered and pecked him on the nose.

Tony grinned stupidly, he was just head over heels in love with the woman leaving his apartment.

"Buona notte", he called and watched her walk away.


End file.
